Two star rating Emma has locked herself in the wardrobe. Robert is raging outside the wardrobe door. The children are screaming – and no wonder – being left on their own while their parents yell at each ot

REVIEW: GOING POTTYAT

New End Theatre, Hampstead

Two star rating

Emma has locked herself in the wardrobe. Robert is raging outside the wardrobe door. The children are screaming - and no wonder - being left on their own while their parents yell at each other. One realises this must be a substantial property - with three small children to house and a huge walk-in wardrobe the size of the New End stage. So it is surprising that they cannot afford to pay someone to help with the children. Instead, they employ a woman who irons Robert's 75 multicoloured shirts and wears Jimmy Choos. Robert has an office job where he is constantly bullied and ridiculed by his superior. Playwright Kate Wyvill plays Emma and also Sally, Robert's work colleague. Sally is a dead ringer for Emma in every way - except for her rabid sexuality - and seduces Robert. Presumably, this play is about the awfulness of being married. But it is more about the awfulness of being married to these two people. They are clumsy, they spill things constantly - no wonder he gets through so many shirts. They are both utterly charmless and their wranglings are not a joy to watch.

True to the style of the piece, the acting is well over the top and Wyvill moves about so much that one is distracted from the dialogue. As this was a preview, maybe it is just not played in yet. And perhaps they will be a little less frenetic once they have got the measure of the theatre.

Until April 1.

Aline Waites